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The phrase ‘kosher ham’ might at first blush seem to be an oxymoron, and yet how else can we describe this meaty, moderately salty, presumably circumcised specimen? Unavailable for quite some time, Stewart is once again out there for for our dining pleasure.

The carcass has a better fat/meat ratio-from a culinary standpoint—than a cursory inspection might suggest; some part of the lean look due to expert tailoring and hiding behind a desk. All in all the carcass is quite presentable, ethnic enough to bring in extra flavors, and yet not so much so that the pork-eating demographic will be uncomfortable. We here at Celebrity Cooking Magazine tend to be wary of items bearing the 'hip' imprimatur, but in this case there seems to be little cause for worry, Stewart not having 'gone off' or 'gone over' or become otherwise spoiled by his time under the spotlight.

The flavors can tend to stray past what is generally considered tasteful, and yet we know that there is real meat here, with an oft-concealed subtlety and depth. Daily  meat and potatoes dishes would benefit from Stewart, as would upscale preparations. Using the potato as a metaphor, we can easily see Stewart paired with everything from French fries to gratins, hash browns to whole baked, pirogues to knishes. The meat would be similarly adaptable most cooking methods, and would be acceptable to a broad audience either rare and juicy, or well done and a touch dry.

Stewart seems to work well enough without a written menu, and provides dependable late night fare. Too ethnic for a minority, too pungent for rabid Kiddie Menu 'values' types, but showing a balance lacking in such specimens as Dennis Miller, or Anne Coulter, who seems blondely unaware she too is a clown.
 
Rating: 4 Forks –5 if prepared by a large staff.

Recipe Suggestions: Bris-ket; Mixed Nut Crusted Chops; Foo Yucks; Fake Newsburgh; Sliced Ham; Whattami Chopped Liver; Commentator Varnishkes

Course advice: Excellent appetizers paired with either mild or strong flavors; nice addition to chicken soup, but beware the inevitable hint of borscht flavor comedians impart, and about which we must endlessly warn our readers; big roasts, hot chops, slow-cooking loins, even sausage, Stewart can do it all.
 
Substitutions: Colbert is less subtle; Mandvi and Oliver too foreign; Bee has better breasts.
 
Beverage suggestions: Manischewitz; Faux Anchor Steam beer; Prune juice (it’s good for you!)
 
Warnings: Unsuitable for anti-Semites and Fox News viewers; can cause confusion and mood disorders in the humorless; not everybody's choice of Easter ham.

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